anxietydepressionliving your best life

attuning to and overcoming fear

Farts aren’t the only thing that can be silent but deadly. 

So can fear.  It can creep in without us knowing and slowly take hold of our hopes, dreams, ambitions, and intentions.  Fear is deadly because it can suck the life out of us.  Fear can paralyze us.  It can keep us in a trance where we are living in accordance with what it dictates instead of what aligns with our true nature, who we really are.  Fear is careful.  Fear makes us live small.  Fear causes us to stoop down instead of level up.  What would you do if fear wasn’t lurking at your door?  Would you make decisions differently?  How would your life be different?  What if you just went for it, no holds barred? 


Where do you feel fear in your body?  I feel it in my throat, my chest, and my stomach.  When I’m really fearful, I start to shake.  What kinds of fear-driven thoughts does your mind manufacture?  Mine says things like, “what will others think of me?” and “I’m not good enough” and “I can’t ______ because ____.”  My fearful mind is full of reasons why I can’t stretch and grow to my full potential.  What are the emotions driving your fear?  The emotions driving my fear show up as doubt, disappointment, pessimism, apprehension, worry, and unworthiness.


How can we overcome fear?  Step 1: realize that your fear wants some attention.  Stop ignoring it, pushing it down, and/or giving way to it.  Look it squarely in the face and invite it into your home for tea.  That’s right.  Have tea with your fear.  Get to know it by spending time with it and asking it what it wants to tell you.  Get to know what it looks like and feels like.  Where in your body does it reside?  Where in your thoughts does it reside?  Spend time with it like you would a friend.  Soften into it and create some space around it.


Offer your fear some compassion.  Say to it, “I see you and I’m here for you.”


Step 2: Take action in opposition to your fear.  Write that letter.  Call up that counsellor.  Start that blog.  Apply for that job.  Leave that toxic relationship.  Speak to that teacher.  Take steps in the direction of what is most important to you with fear by your side.  It will feel wobbly at first.  But as you trust yourself more and more and venture out step by step, your courage will grow and the fear will slowly fade. 


Your fear may never fully leave.  That’s okay.  When you take action in opposition to it and in the direction of what is most important to you, your hopes, dreams, ambitions, and intentions begin to take shape.   When you have tea with your fear, you realize that fear can exist while you take steps forward.  Don’t shut it down.  Pay attention to it and then act in spite of it. 


Until next time,



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