Self-doubt is an emotion that most of us experience from time to time.  What does it feel like?  For me, it's a sinking sensation in my chest.  It's a feeling of stuckness in my torso region.  The thoughts that create this feeling often begin with "Can I_____?" or "I can't_____" or "I'm not sure if I _____".   I can't think of one stress-free reason to swim in these thoughts.  This kind of thinking drive actions in me that reinforce my feeling of self doubt.  When I doubt myself, I show up small, timid, tentative and then I doubt myself more.  What does this look like?  Maybe I agree outwardly with what someone is saying because I don't want to upset them.  Maybe I invent excuses as to why I can't do the thing I said I was going to do.  Maybe someone voices a strong opinion so then I start to doubt my opinion.  Maybe I'm being myself which makes me stand out a bit and then I get embarrassed and shrink away.  There are many permutations and combinations of this for people.  This is how self-doubt shows up for me.

You get rid of self doubt by first of all noticing that it's there and observing the thoughts that are driving it.  This first step is the one that people want to skip because it feels uncomfortable.  They just want to feel better right away.  Nope.  That's not how it works.  You do a ton of self-awareness work on all of the thoughts, feelings, actions, and results you are creating for yourself from the place of self-doubt.  You get to know your self-doubt and like yourself even though you doubt yourself.  It's only from this place of self-like that you can start to live into other possibilities.

One of those possibilities for me is courage.  If I started to envision myself acting out of courage instead of self-doubt, what would that be like?  My actions would change and so would my thoughts.  Ultimately, my results would change.  If I acted out of courage, I would show up bigger in my voice, my body language, and my actions.  I would step out and do more "scary" things without shrinking away.  I would take chances on myself and my opinions.  I'd dream bigger.  I'd put into the world the things most near and dear to my heart.  I would challenge my clients more directly.  If I acted more consistently out of courage instead of self-doubt, it would feel foreign at first and then perhaps thrilling later on.

Until next time,